Attachment Issues

Does your nervous system match with theirs?

You are really into someone. It’s all you can think about. It’s exciting and energizing. You can’t wait to get a text or call from them.

Why haven’t they got back to me yet?

Your chest and stomach are on fire and your head is spinning with thoughts of what this person could be doing instead of getting back to you.

It feels like torture actually.

But you really just started dating and can’t understand why you’re having such a strong reaction.

Things start to feel confusing.

You think you are really into someone. It feels exciting and energizing.

But they text and call more than you’re used to.

Why do they keep reaching out to me? It feels needy.

You start to feel distant from them and ask why you’re never satisfied with anyone you date?

OK, what is actually happening?

Learning how you attach.

It’s a universal truth that someone at some point from a romantic standpoint is going to trigger you. It’s just inevitable.

Did you ever stop to consider that this person who excites you may be triggering your nervous system, in other words, your anxiety? Which is different than romantic feelings?

The point is you don’t really have an accurate view of how you feel until you understand how you attach.

If you can figure out which one, then you’ll have the answer, right?

Am I an anxious-avoidant?

You read the description, and it sounds like someone cold and unfeeling.

What about anxious-preoccupied?

This type of person feels needy and always has to be in a relationship, regardless of how unhealthy it is.

I wish I was securely attached.

This one sounds like the best but seems so implausible.

These are the questions that many often want answers to about attachment. If they just knew which group they belonged to, then the answer to having a good relationship would follow.

But the truth is, it’s not that simple.

Attachment labels aren’t that important. What’s more important is that you understand how you’re triggered and how your anxiety flows. Do you pull back, numb out? Or do you approach with caution, open up, and then attach firmly with a lot of momentum?

When it comes to attachment, you need to know how to read the forest for the trees.

I am your guide.

It’s so crucial to understanding how we match with romantic partners.

You might have missing information about how to attach, and that’s ok. Because how you play out attachment in relationships gives clues as to what happened.

But attachment wounds need to be understood and healed before you can have a strong sense of what kind of relationship works for you.

So, why not have the tools in place to deal with it when it happens? I will teach and mentor you with these tools.

The Game Plan

I am here to:

1. Discover with you what your attachment looks like

2. Reveal how it plays out in the context of your relationships

3. Teach you how to identify and differentiate your relationship anxiety from your actual romantic feelings

Once you understand attachment fully, you can slow down your process, identify what your gaps are, and learn to fill them in yourself.

The result of the recognition of your attachment type is better relationships as you match with people who compliment your nervous system rather than activate it.

Sure, it can be exciting and fun to be with someone who triggers you all the time. But after a while, it gets confusing and takes its toll.

Look, in the end, you may or may not want to be with your current person.

But honestly, you can’t tell yet until you understand attachment.

I will help you.

For a free consultation call (818) 450-6844.